Wednesday, September 14, 2011

Life is like a box of chocolates you never what your going to get.....

In April we found out that we were expecting our first BABY! AAAAHHHHHH! I was so scared and didn't know how we were going to have to a child....we weren't trying to have a baby and I was on the pill yes you lucky people you've just met the 1% of people who get pregnant on the pill. For the first few weeks I was not very excited about this adventure in our life! As I started to tell a few people I got more excited for this little baby to come I even bought it a cute little BYU onsie (for Jamin mostly cause I could careless about that school).

We had a first Dr visit and I was so nervous! He did his thing and told me that my uterus tilted back and that is very normal and not to worry about anything, next he got out his little heart monitor thing and started to listening for the heart beat after a few minutes he couldn't find anything...he reassured us that everything was ok and it was normal with a tilted uterus not to hear the heart beat and I wasn't exactly sure how far along I was (I've learned keeping track of your period is a very good thing and its something I am doing now). He told us to go schedule an ultrasound so that they could measure the baby and know exactly how far along I was. We went to schedule our ultrasound and to our surprise that next appointment was a week away.

After one very long stressful week we went to get our ultrasound....things didn't turn out so good! They found my tiny 9 wk old baby but it had no heart beat....we had lost our baby! I was heartbroken! I've never felt pain and sadness like that before! We then scheduled a D&C procedure to be done. The next few days were really hard I didn't feel normal my body just felt off and sick. I was so nervous for the D&C I've never had any procedure done let a lone really been in a hospital before! I had the procedure done and everything went fine, by the next day I felt pretty normal just sad! I couldn't figure out why it happened to me, I know it happens to women all the time and it is a very common thing to have a miscarriage but I just didn't feel it was fair for me to have to! I know life is full trials and they only make you stronger and this trial has definitely made me stronger and has brought me and Jamin closer. I know the lord wont put any mountain in front of me that I can't climb. I now know I've been through the hardest part of getting pregnant that if it was to ever happen again I know that I will be able to pull through it! I'm so blessed with such an amazing family who was there for me night and day!! I love them all so much!


April said...

I love you sister. I know you went through a very hard thing...everyday it will get easier and easier. And sooner than you will believe a new little baby will be making her way to your family, until then just prepare.

Becca said...

Laura, I'm sorry you had to go through this too. And I agree with April - every day will get a little easier and before you know it a new baby will be here for you.

Love you!

Matthew and Katherine Kerr said...

April, I'm so sorry! I can't imagine your sadness! I love you!

Aunt Pam said...

Laura, I cannot imagine what you went through other than I know how I would have felt myself. You are so blessed to have your faith and to know that He is there for you when you need Him. Love you bunches.